Friday, December 01, 2006

Prayers Answered

Time for a new post, I think.

I would have blogged about this earlier if I hadn't been both busy and miserable, or, as they say in contractionopolis, biserable. But better late than never, I always say. (They always say blaythenver.)

HBO is producing one of the funniest, foulest, most out-and-out, joyfully blasphemous comics every printed, Preacher. As a series. This is good news, brother, good news indeed.

See, Preacher is about a minister who thinks/realizes that God abandoned the world, and so he's gonna go hunt God down, because God's got a lot to answer for. He meets Tulip, his ex-girlfriend, on her way to kill someone, and along the way becomes pals with an Irish vampire named Cassidy. Hijinks ensue, and just when you think you've got the book pegged as a nonstop stream of obscenety and profanity...it rips your heart out. This is great stuff, and a movie wouldn't do it justice. But an HBO series... that's the brass ring, my friends.

So last night some buddies at work were talking about who should play the reverend Jesse Custer in this series. We talked a bit about his look, and frankly, I'm not even sure who we said looked a bit like him if he let his hair fluff out a bit. But I had a more pressing concern. Jesse is a Texan. He's Lone Star, through and through. It's important to get his accent right, and that Texas attitude has to be genuine.

So really, with that in mind, there's only one person who should play Jesse Custer:


Reese Witherspoon.

C'mon, Reese! You're from Texas! And... and... you're from Texas! Throw your hat in the ring!

Rob

P.S. We also determined she should play Iron Fist.

1 comment:

Chris A. said...

(Iron Fist is from Texas too?)

Too bad Preacher's not from Georgia, because then it could be Holly Hunter.

I've never read Preacher (despite many recommendations from you and others), but I looked at the cover you posted... Thomas Haden Church is from Texas, if that would work.

For that matter, there's Woody Harrelson, Matthew McConaughey, Dennis Quaid, Bill Paxton (who I guess already has one HBO series to keep him busy), Kris Kristofferson, Tommy Lee Jones, Powers Boothe, Brent Spiner (!), Lyle Lovett, Willie Nelson, Randall "Tex" Cobb, Sam Elliott...

What? Sam Elliott is from Sacramento?!?

OK, so it doesn't have to be Preacher. Just give me a show where Woody Harrelson and Sam Elliott ride around the country solving mysteries, and Lyle Lovett sings about it. Or, Reese and Holly can do it, and Lucinda Williams can sing about it. Or, Randall "Tex" Cobb and Brent Spiner...