Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Awful Names

I’ve had the dubious pleasure of discovering two mind-numbingly awful names in the past week or so. I don’t know which is worse. One was probably a perfectly good name until someone coined it as an obscene verb; the other, while perfectly suitable for polite company, conjures a disgusting image, which certainly hasn’t changed since the place was named. But enough with the yadda yadda yadda… You wanna know the names.

Felch, Michigan. I work for a magazine, and when we received a letter with this address on it, I had to check to make sure it was a real town. And it is. What can I say? I feel so sorry for those people. These poor Felchers have probably heard enough jokes about their name… or maybe not. I wasn’t able to Google up any references to any legal motions to change the town’s name. But I get grossed out just thinking about it. No wonder Michigan looks like a big glove.

(If you’ve never heard of the word “felch,” you can Google it if you dare. Suffice it to say that it’s something you can do with santorum.)

The second name – chosen regardless of its culinary implications – is The Pizza Coop, a pizza and hoagie shop in eastern Pennsylvania. Chickens…pigeons…ugh. Whatever the coop, I don’t want it to have anything to do with my pizza. I think about those rooftop scenes in On the Waterfront and get queasy. I’ll have mine plain, thanks.

Anyone have any other horrible names they’d like to share?

Rob

1 comment:

Andrew said...

How about Dirty Dick's Crab House? Their slogan is, "I got my crabs from Dirty Dicks." See for yourself.